“Bring on the men.” If you watched the first episode of “The Bachelorette” last Monday, that phrase seemed to be Bachelorette Jojo Fletcher’s catchphrase as tight-suited weirdos emerged from the limo to try and sweep Jojo off her feet.
A guy in a Santa suit, a dirty-joke making fiend in a kilt and a guy who brought two blue balls for Jojo to hold emerged from the limo to procure the usual Bachelorette second-hand embarrassment. Some of the boys, including Jordan, Aaron Rodgers’ extra hot brother, and super charming Wells, really showed that they were strong contenders in the fight for Jojo’s heart.
The first group date of the second episode took 10 guys to go do firefighter training. In true Bachelorette form, Jojo comes out looking incredible in a sexy firefighter costume, because we all love an elegant metaphor. Grant, who is a firefighter in real life, won the competition and some extra time with Jojo. Back at the mansion, Derek gets a weird card that says “love is full of choices,” signaling that he, for some reason, gets the one-on-one date.
Back at the group date, Jojo pretends to be interested in some of the guys’ life stories, and Wells ends up getting the rose, probably because he barely made it through the firefighter challenge alive. But he’s a radio DJ, so fitness is not exactly in his wheelhouse.
In an emotional, semi-eloquent moment, Grant the firefighter tells Jojo "I'm never gonna leave my house and not wake you up and not kiss you and not tell you I love you before I leave, because as messed up as it sounds, like, there's a chance that I might not come back." One of the better moments from the episode for sure.
Derek and Jojo head to San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge for the one-on-one. They do some hand-holding (zoomed in on, of course, in true Bachelorette style), and they make out after talking about Derek’s fiance once cheating on him. It doesn’t seem great and their connection feels off, so I don’t predict Derek will make it more than one or two episodes after this.
Jojo’s second group date was at SportsNation, and all of the guys were more excited than when they met Jojo for the first time. They did a few sporty challenges that culminated in the boys spinning around and then fake proposing to Jojo. Chad, ever the bad sport, refused to do it and then called Jojo “naggy.” Despite being annoying, Chad got second and James T. got first in the contest. Chad had another breakdown, something that’s already getting old.
Early on, Chad made himself out to be the villain. Except for his corny kiss with Jojo by the wishing well and his awkward story about his tiny dog during the cocktail party, he spent a majority of the episode being a terrible person. According to Alex, he is “the highest level of d-bag.”
Everyone should have teared up at sweet James Taylor’s boyish excitement as he read a letter to Jojo, earning him a rose. Of course, Chad threw a ridiculous fit while all the other boys pretended to be fine with another dude getting the rose. He is, again according to Alex, “public enemy No. 1 when it comes to the guys.”
Compared to wide-mouthed villain Olivia Caldi from Ben’s season, Chad has showed his bad side early, in a creepy Christian Grey-esque way. Especially after he ambushes Jojo before she gets to the cocktail party, a move that makes all the guys even more frustrated.
After a long montage of Chad eating different kinds of deli meat while the other boys talk behind his back about the amount of food he’s eating, he swoops the one-on-one with Alex, and then he swoops the one-on-one with Evan.
Vigilante Alex takes it upon himself to fully confront Chad about his behavior, and Chad gets in Alex’s face. After the confrontation, Chad tells Alex as he’s walking away that Alex should be afraid of him, the first of many threats from Chad based on the promo for the rest of the drama-filled season.
Then it’s time for the rose ceremony, and Chad stands in the background eating a piece of roast beef. James T., Derek and Wells got the roses during their dates, so they’re safe for the ceremony. The rest of the roses go to Alex, Christian, Robby, Luke, Chase, Jordan, Grant, Ali, Daniel, James F., Nick, Vinny, Evan and Chad. She picks Chad last for the drama factor, but not before he says that if he went home he would confront Jojo and tell her “That’s bullshit, you know you like me.” He’s so tiring. That sends James S., Brandon and Will home. I had to look up their names because I had no idea who they were, so it’s not a huge loss to the show.
This episode didn’t feature Jordan as much as the other episodes, which means he’ll be a bigger contender in the end for sure. The winner is always involved in the drama, but they’re not at the center of it. I’m still picking Wells, James Taylor and Jordan for the final three, but it could definitely shift as the season goes on (as it always does).
Besides Jojo thanking every single boy after they kissed her like Rory Gilmore when Dean first kisses her, the episode was filled with uncomfortable Chad moments more than romance with Jojo. I’m hoping for more drama next week, especially because there was the big Chad moment teased for the two-day episodes next week.
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Edited by George Roberson | firstname.lastname@example.org