Sex Edna: Education is vital to a healthy and happy sex life

From anatomy to toys to boundaries and so forth, education is key.

By Edna Smith | Feb. 14, 2017

Tags: Health Sex & Relationships


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Sex education in schools, if present at all, does not even scratch the surface of the sexual universe. There is so much out there, from positions to toys to BDSM and so on. There is a whole world of possibilities, and it is detrimental to a person’s current or potential sex life to not be aware of the many options.

First and foremost, it is crucial and arguably most important to know the sexual anatomy. If you have ever heard about prostate cancer and had to think about what a “prostate” is and where on the body it is located, that is a major clue you do not know enough about your own or your partner’s body. Check out your old high school anatomy textbook or a medical resource and take a look.

Secondly, it is important to be knowledgeable about toys. Sex toy education is ridiculously undervalued. Many of these toys are meant to be inserted into the body, so knowing where to put them, how they work and how to clean them is a major health priority. Using home objects for sexual pleasure is probably not the safest or best option. Knowing what you’re looking for and what to buy is nothing to be insecure about. Adult stores are there for you, despite their unwelcoming appearance. Sex toys can be used for self-love and for partner play. Some are to be inserted or put on, and others are meant to be played on. There are a lot of sex toy options and categories. Do not be afraid to search porn sites, merchandise sites or even watch sex tutorials to get educated and maybe even inspired.

Ignorance is not bliss when it comes to sex toys. I remember when I received my first sex toy. Yes, received, not purchased; it’s a long story. Anyways, when I first opened the bag of goodies, this one silver, smooth object caught me off guard. I honestly was not sure what it was, or where I was supposed to put it. So I did the only thing to do in that situation. I Googled “sex toys.” Voilà! There it was, the exact same thing I had in my hand: a butt plug. With that discovery, there came a lot of questions. How do I put this thing in? Do I use lube? Is this sanitary? How do I clean it? Needless to say, I am a clean freak, and I spent the next couple of hours learning anal and sex toy hygiene. Then after I felt my sanitation needs had been satisfied, I searched the answer of the most important question: how do I make this look sexy? Porn was definitely the most helpful. All in all, I got my sex questions answered before I just went to shoving something up my ass.

Before you engage in anything involving a sex toy, find out what you want to do, what you’re willing to do, and what is a no-no for your sex life. Porn can be incredibly helpful. Whether you are sexually conservative, hardcore or just plain inactive, porn and sex tutorials can give you a clear insight into all things sex. They can show you how to use toys, how to please your partner, how to please yourself, et cetera. At the very least, porn can fully demonstrate the sexual reference you heard from a friend or on TV. Do not dismiss the sex position sections of magazines either. Some are pure gems, but you should make sure you understand them before you go for it. Don’t hurt yourself.

After you have explored these first three steps, you won’t be completely oblivious when it comes time to do the deed. The sexual world can be infinitely fun and exciting, but it can also be risky and dangerous if you’re not knowledgeable of what you’re getting into. Educating yourself about sex is imperative for both your sexual pleasure and safety. You do not want to get caught in an awkward or (nonconsensual) painful scenario. So check out the places your search engine sends you. Explore. Most of all, learn something. Your sex life will thank you for it.

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