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What not to do on a first date

By Lyndsey Garza

Published Nov. 23, 2010

There are too many blunders that could blast a first date, but usually it is what comes blurting out of you mouth that will bury you. Lucky for you, it is preventable with the help of the following. You won't be the one on burying the date next time.

1. You might call your pot dealer “dude,” but do not let this one slip when addressing your date. Not only will this clue her in that you have limited experience with how to treat a woman, but it will also denote a preteen-like immaturity that will repel the maturity you might be seeking. It only takes one word to destroy a possibility for a second date.

2. Pretend this is the first person you have ever been on a date with. Any early mentions of past relationships will buzz-kill any date in seconds flat. If your date does bring up what you are looking for or asks for more information on your dating history, be honest and brief. Let your date know you hardly speak to your ex, but you wish the best for them. After all, your date will not care if the last partner was an Olympic water polo player and loved watching “Top Chef,” but they will care you took the time to mention a former flame. This only leads to future arguments.

3. Steer clear of discussing your job or salary in detail. Not only is money a hot button issue but this is also a sure way to produce feelings of incompetence. Instead of gloating about the $15 hourly wage you get for filing papers on campus, pick up the tab and show your date you can support yourself and them. This speaks much louder and, trust me, money sure can talk.

4. Do not linger on one subject for too long. Give your date short anecdotes about yourself and recent experiences, but be conscious of letting your date talk about their life equally. There is nothing worse than being with a date who will not let a word in between their rant about wanting to drop out of college and traveling the world until they hit it big.

Anecdotes about your childhood, such as your parents divorcing or a death, can clue your date into the deeper and more emotional side. It also raises red flags that you could be ridden with issues. Even though this might be unfair, talking up downfalls early on can give anyone a poor representation of the strong and driven individual you are today.

1. Proposing sex on the first date will not only end most first dates, but, by asking too early, you could be preventing the romp that could have been. Having sex will change the dynamics between daters enormously. You will skip over valuable time that could have been spent courting and miss the opportunity to harvest more powerful sexual tension.

2. Avoid planning the wrong type of date for the occasion. Typically for first dates, you want to plan something that will allow you to talk, such as meeting up for coffee or sushi. Something low pressure, but something that will allow you to concentrate fully on getting to know your date and establishing familiarity. Second dates are perfect for something more active, such as dancing, going on a hike or going to a music festival. This is a sure way to have your conversation flow smoothly and without slip up.